Avoiding all the misery that snow has brought those travelling home this xmas, and all the political disasters that will no doubt continue into the new year as well as world war 3 starting on the Korean peninsula, lets just all shut the world out and watch these 12 movies over xmas.
1. Die Hard
On the first day of xmas, my true love gave to me, a long hard night in Nakatomi!
The story of the worst ever Xmas party ever, just gets better and better each Xmas.
On the second day of Xmas, my true love gave to me, a wonderfully angry Bill Murray!
Bah Humbug has never been so funny as the modern take on it, which may never be topped. Top 10 moments from Scrooged
3.Nightmare Before Xmas
On the third day of xmas, my true love gave to me, some creepy stick puppets from Tim Burton, that somehow come good for xmas.
Ok, so it didn’t rhyme, but it’s a Tim Burton flick, nothing really does what it should
On the fourth day of xmas, my true love gave to me, A Stay Puft Marshmallow Finale!!
This is the second time round for a Bill Murray Flick and there’s just something about this film that is the perfect xmas comedy. Ghosts, Interdimensional threats, and 4 comedians with Ray Guns. Murray Xmas. And of course. The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man!!
5. Bad Santa
On the 5th day of xmas, my true love gave to me, Billy Bob Thornton being Nasty!!!
This has got to be the meanest, nastiest, funniest xmas film ever. It’s like Santa from another dimension. Or the future. In Ireland. After the EU have screwed us! Here are his thoughts on reindeers.
On the 6th day of xmas, my true love gave to me, the Anchorman Ron Burgundy
Not Will Ferrells best, but if nothing else, then to watch peter dinklage try to beat the crap out of him.
On the 7th day of xmas, my true love gave to me, a Buzz lightyear and a woody!!
It’s about toys that come to life. What? You didn’t think this every xmas morning when you started playing rescue the star wars figures with your action man on a tank that was too small for him.!!! Come on!!!
8.Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
On the 8th day of Xmas, my true love gave to me, a ticket to a chocolate factory.
No way would this film happen today, what with industrial action closing most factories and as for health and safety!! I mean really!, one of your guests goes through the plumbing and you just continue the tour. No way hose!
Alternatively, you could watch it’s horror sequel “Gobstopper”, with Christopher Lloyd, where he plays the evil Willy. The acting of the other kids in this trailer signifies it will never see the light of day!
9.Star Trek 2 – The Wrath of Khan.
On the 9th day of xmas, my true love gave to me, Kirk, Spock, Bones and Scotty.
An unusual choice but with the themes of revenge and redemption…ok forget that, first time I ever saw this movie was xmas, and I will always associate “From hells hot I spit at thee, with my last breath I stab at thee” with xmas. I think it was a bad year for gifts that year.
On the 10th day of Xmas, my true love gave to me, a mogwai that turned quite nasty.
This film should have scared me as a kid, but it just fascinated me, and made you wonder about pets that seem cute but could go bad. From then on, I always fed my budgie on time. But never after midnight.
Gremlin gets microwaved!Classic!
11.It’s a Wonderful Life
On the 11th day of Xmas, my true love gave to me, a suicidal actor called jimmy…
I resisted the urge to watch this film for years, as I expected it to be the schmaltziest load of Richard curtis like aromatic equivelant of lavender sick that I would ever have come across. And for once, I can admit I was wrong. Quick witted, with a warm heart and a dark eye for a suicidal tendency, if you can get over the whole, “There be angels up there”, it is perfect xmas fodder.
12.Muppets Christmas Carol
On the 12th day of Xmas, my true love gave to me, Kermit, Gonzo, and Fozzie!! Ok and Miss Piggy.